Philisophical Thought Experiment

If you are clever and there is no one around to hear it, are you still being clever?

Why I'm Not in a Relationship

He's a selfish, whining, negative loser and I'm a self-aggrandizing intolerant bitch. Let's call the whole thing off.
He's an unstable egomaniacal jerk and I'm a lonely poser of immaterial self-assuredness. Let's call the whole thing off.